Found+READ: Stories by Larry Chiang

How to Work the Room

Larry Chiang — Mon, 25 Jun 2007 07:44:55 GMT

So you’ve got your engineering degree, and your marquee MBA, and a business-plan. You’re on your way. But at some point you’re going to have to ‘grace’ your way through an important networking or social event. How you handle this matters—probably more than you care to admit.
Anyone who has attended a Silicon Valley networking event can attest to the fact that “Social Graces” often elude us founders. But if we were “hacking” or “grocking” our way to better methods of networking, the user manual would be 10 inches thick! There is such a thing as “Social-Business Protocol.” Not all of us in the startup universe are born with it, we can all learn it. So, here are my 10 tips for founders en route to the power-party circuit.

1. Be more of a host and less of a guest.
“Susan Roane”:http://www.susanroane.com/ and “Letitia Baldridge”:http://www.baldrigelewris.com/1551581.html say there are two types of people at a party: hosts and guests. People like hosts more because they make introductions, and make people more comfortable. Guests tend to need attention and maintenance. Susan wrote the ageless book “How to Work a Room”:http://www.susanroane.com/books_work.html and Letitia wrote “Executive Manners”:http://www.allbusiness.com/management-companies-enterprises/102143-1.html.

2. Avoid permanently joining a “rock pile.” A rock pile is a pack of people in a tight circle. It’s natural to huddle because it makes us feel safe, but it borders on anti-social.

3. Dress for the party. The more junior you are, the better you should dress. I always try to dress up because of my lower-than-average IQ. On the other hand, an advanced networking strategy is to show up severely under/over-dressed. If you’re caught off guard with an impromptu invite, execute under-dressed (aww shucks) “Mark Zuckerburg’s Adidas flip-flop routine”:http://www.exceler8ion.com/wp-images/mark-zuckerberg-facebook250px.jpg.

4. Don’t “hotbox”. Hotboxing is squaring the shoulders front and center to one person. In groups one person will often “hotbox” the target/VIP of the group. Hotboxing in a one-on-one conversation is OK, but it excludes others from joining.

5. Put your coat and bag down. Your coat is non-verbal communication that you: a) need a shield; b) just got there; c) don’t trust the host’s coat check; d) are not healthy enough to keep your body at 98.6; e) are imminently about to leave. Women can be forgiven for keeping a purse, but it’s a networking sin for a man to keep a ‘man-purse’ (i.e. backpack, tote- or laptop-bag).

6. Mentor someone about your—or your company’s—core competence. Since Duck9 educates college students about FICO scores and debt minimization, I have networking talking points on FICO scores and the urban legends that surround them. It transitions nicely from the what-do-you-do-for-work question. It also adds some substance to party conversations and clearly brands you as a person. I’m the duck dude, with the magnet for a card, that does credit education.

7.Don’t forget to get mentored as well. A great guy I know has one rule for social-professional success: his party goal is to learn three new things at every event. It is very effective. He tilts his head like my shih tzu and gets all sorts of credit for being a great listener.

8. Be a good host while you’re someone else’s guest. Say ‘Hi’ to wall flowers. I once saw a tier-1 celebrity work the fringe of the room. He must’ve said ‘Hi’ to 12 wallflowers. Actors don’t get paid
to act, they get paid to promote. As entrepreneurs, we better promote ourselves by being gracious to everyone. This means making introductions, too. Introduce a junior person to a senior person. Include one positive snipet about both as you do so: “Sarah, I’d like to introduce Hazel, she started Fashion4 and also leads the “Ladies Who Launch” here in Silicon Valley. Hazel, this is my friend Sarah whom I told you about from…” (“Letitia Baldridge”:http://www.baldrigelewris.com/1551581.html has an entire chapter on this.)

9. Managing the party host. When you’re interacting with the host, ask simple questions requiring a ‘Yes/No’ response. I’ve heard disastrous questions in a vain attempt to out alpha-male the host. The best questions to ask of a host are upbeat, light and fluffy. If you want to be Mike Wallace/Chris Matthews with a hardball question, tread lightly. Also, help your host wiggle by wrangling them away from guests who are monopolizing or “hotboxing” them. They will thank you later.

10. Always, always, always: Thank the host before you leave.

These are some of the basics of good networking. One bonus tip for when you are havng a hard time at an event: play ‘Convo Bingo’. Make a list of ‘bingo’ words in your head and every time you hear a word on your list,cross it off. This will force you to listen intently and actively drive the conversation towards your “bingo words.” It also makes you a better audience to other guests. A sample bingo card is available “here”:http://www.duck9.com/bingo.

Wooing People to 'Yes'!

Larry Chiang — Fri, 03 Aug 2007 13:49:38 GMT

Every founder knows the pain of a sales call. Sales calls aren’t tough because ‘The Spiel’ is tough. Sales calls are painful because getting turned down is painful. What helped me and my cofounders make the Dean’s List in engineering school (while launching our peer-to-peer credit company for college students called “Duck 9”:http://www.duck9.com/about-us.htm) doesn’t help us with the pain of hearing the word ‘No’. But wasn’t it the fear of hearing ‘No’ that drove us to succeed in the first place? We all want that one credential (a diploma?) that will serve as our silver bullet—allowing us to bust through any and all future ‘No!’s, right? Which leads me to some tips I’ve acquired over time for getting to ‘Yes!’:

1) Turning pre-No’s into Maybe’s.
Some gatekeepers can only say ‘No.” Beat them to saying ‘No’ with the Second Supplier Gambit (SSG). This means setting aside your need to sell something in lieu of fulfilling your prospects’ needs. Love them, meet their needs and turn them into possible maybe’s.

2) Preparing for a probable ‘No’ with flowers.
I have a staffer, Lillian Miller, that wanted veeeery badly to go to TechCrunch TC20 promo party at August Capital on tony Sand Hill Road in Menlo Park, Calif. I already had 7 “plus ones”. I wasn’t gonna add a Duck9er into the mix. I did tell her to prep the ‘no’ with flowers and it works like this:

1= send flowers with note
2= personally deliver
3= hope that they remember you and say ‘maybe’ at the door.

I know 20 people that wanted to go, but none of then would risk rejection at the door. Lillian reduced her likelihood of hearing ‘no’ with flowers, and then braved the possibility of rejection. She got in.

3) Spend $400 a year to hear fewer ‘No’s.
Budget for thank you gifts. If someone would’ve said ‘No’ but then said ‘Yes’, you owe them something. If you ‘budgeted’ $40,000 for education, you can afford $4,000, or at least $400 a year on gifts. And get some Thank You cards, too.

4) The premptive ‘No’ manuver.
This is where you say ‘No’ before they tell you ‘No’. Nothing is started until the potential buyer first says ‘No, thanks’. Just like a long term personal relationship—it doesn’t start until the first break-up. Professionally this is risky because it can make you look pyschotic in that you’re saying ‘No’ because you’re wooing them. But try it, you’ll be surprised how taking an offer off the table makes someone want it again.

5) Try to turn your ‘No’ into a ‘Waitlist’.
A great way to turn ‘No’s into a ‘Maybe’ is getting waitlisted. “No you can’t come to film school”, this is what I heard from USC in 1998 when I retired from “United College Marketing Serivces, Inc”:http://www.ucms.com/. But I got my rejection commuted to “last-on-waitlist-status.” I sent flowers to the registrar as a thank you. Magically, twenty-some people dropped out, and I was in! When your next customer says ‘No’ ask him/her if they’ve closed the deal with someone else—if not, ask to be put on their ‘waitlist’—and send a gift.

6) Don’t be afraid to be a Puppy Dog.
I don’t mean beg. I mean that happy, indefatigably enthusiastic puppies always get to ‘Yes’. I play this card on my co-founder all the time. He never wants to take a break from work. I just never stopped inviting him out. Eventually, I get him to Las Vegas or to a party for something quasi-work related, and before he knows it, he’s partying into the wee hours with celebs thanks to my puppy dog close. Play Baxter.

7) Identify and seek-out people more likely to say ‘Yes.’
Craft a ‘nay-sayer’ profile so you can identify people who are likely to say ‘Yes’ than ‘No,’ and adjust your strategy accordingly. For example, if someone hears ‘No’ a lot, they’ll say ‘No’ a lot, too, sometimes without reason. But ‘Yes’ is even more infectious. Karma is obvious, cyclical and readable. Approach people who hear ‘Yes,’ and chances are they’ll say ‘Yes’ to you.

8) Hire people who have a tolerance for ‘No’
Your business will be more successful if you surround yourself with people who can tolerate ‘No.’ As a rule the hungrier a person is, the more tolerant s/he will be of initial rejection. Consider:

(A) Prestige is often inversely proportional to tolerance for ‘No.’ In my experience when privileged peeps or top-tier educated people hear ‘No’ the wagon wheels come off. (My fellow Illinois alumni, Larry Ellison, Marc Andressen, Jeremy Stoppleman, Hugh Hefner, Thomas Siebel, etc. all faced hardship as young men. Hire people who can deal with ‘No’ like a high school drop-out, street smart billionaire.)

(B) Don’t hire a male supermodel. Derek Zoolander-types don’t hear ‘No.’ When they do they implode. Even if he’s “hardcharging” avoid hiring an inflated egomaniac as your VP of Sales.

9) Responses for the inevitable ‘No’s.
A boxing legend friend of mine once told me, “Larry, everyone has a plan until they get hit.” It’s good advice for entrepreneurship as well. Several wrong-headed attitudes are adopted when a ‘No’ is heard. We all know that defensiveness kryptonite to entrepreneurship, so avoid these attitudes at all costs:

(A) You’re too dumb to “get it”
(B) You’ll be sorry when I’m proved right later
(C) I’ll never ask again; the offer is forever off the table to you.

10) Practice and Learn to Love ‘No’.
This is another way of saying thicken your skin. The more comfortable you are with hearing uncomfortable responses like ‘No’ the more likely you are to be successful at converting a ‘No’ to a ‘Yes.’ So practice hearing the word ‘No’ by:

A) asking outlandishly bold questions of people without fear
B) invite out men/women who are out of your ‘league’
C) try things you know you can’t do and get comfortable with little, transient (!) failures.

Learning how to tolerate the juxtaposition of pleasure (‘Yes’) and pain (‘No’) is something entrepreneurs NEED to be good at. So don’t get discouraged when you hear ‘No.’ If you are enterprising, and take risks in life, you will hear thousands of ‘No’s: ‘No, you can’t come to the JD/MBA program’ ; ‘No, we can’t fund Duck9’ ; ‘No, you can’t have a discount on your office space’; ‘No, I won’t go out with you.’ But take heart. Statistically if you can migrate 1 in 10 ‘No’s to a ‘Yes’ you are going to be succesful—and possibly very rich, too.

8 Tips On How To Get Mentored!

Larry Chiang — Wed, 05 Sep 2007 07:13:32 GMT

Finding a mentor is one of the most important things a founder can do. It’s hard to overestimate the value of a confidant from whom you can seek feedback on your idea, advice on strategy, or a little support when that entrepreneurial energy flags. But cultivating a mentor can be difficult – it takes finding the right person, and then a lot of investment. One of the benefits of living in the Bay Area is that we rub elbows with people nearly every day who have achieved things— created new products, built businesses—that we would also like to achieve in the future. This means we have a lot of opportunities for mentorship. The good news is many high-achievers want to share their lessons-learned with a young founder, because doing so adds to their own fulfillment.

I created a company that incorporates mentorship into the sales process. My first company in college, UCMS, mimicked my mentor, Grif Frost. He had an international trade company and I ‘copied’ a marketing company after it because I argue that selling to college students is like selling to a foreign country because students consume different media, live in insulated dorm environments and communicate using IM/chat/sms.

I like mentorship. I love the dynamics between student and teacher. I love the short cuts to learning and insights that mentorship fosters. I mostly love the fact that it taps a higher consciousness and improves decision-making. One of your jobs as a founder is to tap into this resource for mentorship to help yourself learn better and faster.

With this in mind, I offer 8 Tips on Mentorship that I have collected from my own founder experiences, and my voracious consumption of books on the topic:

1) Woo your mentor by reading so you’ll be ready to meet him.
There’s a quote: “When the student is ready the teacher will appear.” Well, I don’t know that it’ll be as magical for you but I do know that if you don’t prepare, you won’t be ready. Read what they read and if they tell you to read something, email them with follow-up questions.

2) Follow-up. A kiss of death is to NOT do something immediately that your mentor has told you point blank to do. Trust me, the email follow-up technique is critical and effective. Follow-up with regular snail mail too…. follow up early and often.

3) Bribe your mentor with a personal touch. Sure you can use gifts but mentors also seek thankfulness or recognition. Sometimes people access people of power by going through the mentor’s kids. My bribes come in the form of handwritten cards—simple, I know, but that’s what works—notes interwoven in office junk mail to brighten up the post box leave an impression.

4) Find a C.A.T., a “Consumer Advocacy Truth,” to gain access to VIPs and amplify your megaphone. Aligning with a powerfully good CAT gets you access to powerful people. My mantra at d.u.c.k.9 is “interest is a KILLER” and “college students FICO prepped”. It gets me branded and gets access because of the C.A.T. halo.

I met Congressman Tom Campbell based on a CAT that aligned with his legislative agenda. I argued at a previous company called CampusBackBone that college students’ private information shouldn’t get sold by the three reporting credit bureaus. Congressman Campbell invited me to introduce a privacy bill and he pointed me towards DC resources in our government affairs push.

5) Thank your mentor publicly. I have this guy that I think is genius. I met him on a panel at Stanford VLAB. He’s helped me for free for a few years now. When I see him at networking events, I point and say: ‘Hey look there’s my mentor!’ That makes me look good. My mentor hates being embarrassed but you know what?? He answers work snafus via email in under an hour even when he’s on vacation. I found him by using the next tip…

6) Be a value-added stalker. Let’s say you hear a book recommendation for “Moneyball” from Roelof Botha at Sequoia Ventures during a panel. Email him about it. Stalk him into being a temporary book club pen pal. Study buddies turn into work buddies and work buddies will mentor you.

7) Leverage mentor dynamics.
a. People that are like each other, tend to like each other
b. Father-son or mother-daughter dynamic. Maybe their kids don’t listen. But you will, and you’ll get their help. In my family, the men listen to their uncles more than we listen to our fathers.
c. Gender dynamic. I can’t speak for women, but there’s a woman who wrote this book called “Goal Digging”. She dates men for mentorship. I can’t make this stuff up. Maybe I should ask Jessica Simpson about FICO score hacks at our next dinner.
d. Mentorship involves BOTH parties learning. Often the mentor gets to solidify his knowledge in transferring it to you, so mooch away know that you are helping smarten your mentor too.

8) Kiss mentor butt region. Hey, I read your blog post, your book (or your article on Found|READ! hahaa jk) and I am a fan. Entrepreneurs or investors who write personal blogs are probably good candidates for becoming mentors because they’re already demonstrating a desire to share. Authors often publish an email address on the back of their books, and certainly on their websites, so use them.

Try out these tips and let me know how they work for you. Comment below what ONE thing you’ll change/adopt/coopt or candoodle in the comments section to publicize your effort to get mentored. I hope the mentor who will take you to the next level is right around the corner!